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Like the Muslims else where, a Muslim marriage in Kerala is a
simple contract between the boy and the girl's father. The presence of the
girl is not essential for the marriage.
The "nikkah" - the ritual of contract - needs to be made in
the presence of two male witnesses and the services of the mullah
(musaliar in local language), is needed for observing some of the Islamic
guidelines. The groom needs to give a mehr (dower) to the girl's father
while accepting his daughter as his wife.
Islam does not stipulate any religious ceremony for marriage as
such. Consequently, local flavor has found their way in to marriage
ceremonies.
Like other communities in kerala, the elders occupy the center
stage and decide the future of their issue. Rather than the compatibility
factor, the financial and social standings get prominence. Once the
initial discussions between two families are over, girl and boy get to
meet each other.
If
they like each other, a particular day is fixed for the conduct of the
initial process, "valayidal"- the custom of giving gold ornaments
to the girl.
The date for the function of engagement, is arrived at through
mutual consultations. On this day, some male members of the bride's family
will go to the groom's house, and after reciting some parts of Koran
(usually the first chapter); the boy will be given some gold ornaments or
cash. At some places dowry is passed. This betrothal is a contract, not
bound by any law or religious custom, and can be broken, if one wishes
so.
On
the preceding day of the marriage, sister of the groom and some female
relatives proceed to the bride's house to take part in "mailanchi"(or
mehendi)- a practice of applying henna on the girl's hand as part of
beautifying her. On the marriage day, the groom and his entourage will
reach the place of marriage (it can be held at any place. Usually it is
held at marriage halls and some use the option of marrying at mosques) at
the appointed time. Brother of the girl receives him there and a bouquet
and garland is offered to the groom.
Then the groom is led
to the place where "nikkah"- the marriage contract- will take place. After
reciting some portions from the holy Koran, by the mullah, the groom and
the father of the bride are made to express the oath of acceptance.
Bride's father makes the statement to the effect that he marries away the
girl to the prospective husband according to the Islamic way. The
bridegroom then declares his acceptance of that commitment and that he has
married the woman according to the terms specified.
After this the groom is led to the women's section (men and women
are segregated at all the functions). Here he will tie a gold chain around
the neck of the bride, assisted by his sister.
After the wedding there is a big reception, given by the bride's
parents to guests from both sides. After the reception bride is taken to
the groom's house and later they will proceed towards the bride's house.
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